Issue #10: "Tips on Meeting the Band"

Well, another convention season is upon us with the announcement of the annual New York KISS Expo. Although there has been at least one convention before this in 1999 (the Atlanta Expo done by the excellent organizers, Creatures of the South), the New York con is the granddaddy of them all. This convention has been going strong since 1985 and within the past three years has begun to branch out into obtaining guests from other areas of hard rock and heavy metal. It's also the best place to see dealers that you won't typically find at all the other conventions.

One of the highlights of each new convention is the chance to get autographs and even talk a bit with the guests that are appearing. For many fans, these cons are a gold-mine, especially in light of the fact that rock music does not have something like the country music Fan Fairs (where a slew of country music performers get together in one place to greet fans and sign autographs). Unless you have an in with someone connected with a good rock club in town (and even HAVE a good rock club in town) or can get into the N.A.M.M. cons (and can attend), then chances of even meeting some of these musicians are pretty slim.

Not only do the convention offer fans a chance to meet people connected with KISS, but with the band now on tour again, fans can also take a shot at meeting KISS somewhere on the road. In other words, the time is ripe to meet people connected with KISS.

Most fans already know this and are either going to the expos or trying to meet up with the band during the tour. In fact, a few fans have even asked how they can meet up with the band. While I can't really help people with getting backstage, I can give some advise on meeting the band member. Over the years I have met them several times in different situations and I've seen good and bad sides of the fan-relationship. When it is bad, it is sometimes the fault of the performer; other times (and more frequently) it is something that the fan did to make the situation uncomfortable.

A key element is how to actually meet up with a member of the band. The Expos are good for meeting up with former members and people associated with the band. If, however, you intend to run into the band out on the road, some simple Do's and Don'ts should be kept in mind.

Unless you've were able to plan something in advance with a person at the arena or hall, DON'T expect to get backstage before the show. "Meet and Greets" used to be a standard for the band back in the late '80s/early /90s. The return of the makeup changed that. With the exception of an occasion "Meet and Greet" for radio contest winners, the band rarely does anything official to meet fans before the shows anymore. Even if they do, such "M&G" will happen long before the makeup goes on for the show. After that, the band has a standing policy of avoiding the public in order to get psyched up for the performance that night. So if you arrived when the doors opened, you can probably forget that route. Even the groupies rarely have a chance nowadays (unless they only wanted to meet the opening band). And speaking of backstage --

DON'T expect to get backstage AFTER the show. KISS has always made it a policy to leave the arena immediately after a performance. Even if they stick around to change and take off the makeup, they normally work very quickly so they can get back to the hotel within a short period of time. This should be remember if you are offered an "after-show" backstage pass by someone. Remember that the pass will probably mean a chance to stick around outside the backstage area for a half hour after the concert before security looks you in the eyes and tells you to leave. It does not guarantee you backstage, and if you do go back, it does not guarantee meeting the band. I mention it as the roadies for KISS back in the '80s were notorious for handing out "after-show" passes left and right and it would not be unusual for 40 or 50 people to be standing outside the backstage area with passes at the end of the show -- all leaving in disappointment.

With the arena or hall out of the questions, there's always the hotel. However --

DON'T assume that the band must be staying at the hotel nearest the arena, or even staying in town. I can' tell you how many times I've seen KISS fans hanging out at a hotel near the arena and the band was not there (I know because I was one of those fans on a couple of occasions). If anyone is staying there, it may be some of the roadies or the opening act. Most probably it will just be other fans.

It is also possible that the band may not even be staying in town. Check the tour schedule for the logistics of this option. If the next show is tomorrow and the town is 1,000 miles away, the band probably left on the tour bus right after the show to head to the next city.

Also keep in mind that some bands park their tour buses in another hotel's parking-lot to throw fans off from where the band is actually staying. So don't just assume the band is staying somewhere if you see a tour bus. If you do find the hotel, remember --

DO understand that a hotel IS A HOTEL and not just a place for you to crash in the lobby for hours. It is for the paying guests, and unless you have a room at the hotel, you can and probably WILL be asked to leave. Also, knowing that a famous band is staying at the hotel will certainly alert the hotel detective (she was a -- oops, sorry, slipped into tmbg-mold) or security to keep an eye out for loiterers.

You might try getting a hotel room, thus guaranteeing yourself the right to roam the hotel and stay in the lobby. However, there is always the risk that the band may decide not to stay there that night and such hotels can be expensive. If you decide to just risk the chance of being asked to leave, dress accordingly. Casual dressing is find, but if you're sitting in the lobby of a 4-star hotel with your sweat-drenched KISS t-shirt and confetti in you hair, you're probably going to look out of place.

On that topic, however --

DO leave the hotel if you are asked to leave. This goes for the arena as well. You can try sticking around and you may luck out, but 9 times out of 10 security will ask you why you are there. If the answer isn't good enough, they will tell you to leave. Perhaps nicely at first, but a lot harder very quickly if you don't move.

If they ask you to leave, just go. No crying, yelling or cursing will help you or the fans around you. In fact, it'll just make security even more determined to get you and all the other KISS fans out of there before you go berserk and starting swinging at people (at least that's what he/she will be thinking by that time). Just leave and avoid embarrassing the human race, okay?

Another option is to wait by the tour buses, but in the dead of winter that can be a bit of a drag. Also, DO remember that the band may not be able to stop and sign for you there, especially if it's freezing and it's right after a show. Most probably, they're hot, sweaty and just want to get to their rooms to relax a little.

Your best bet at the buses or a limo waiting for them is in the morning after a show. The members are usually waiting to leave for their next destination and are a bit more relaxed. There usually isn't as many fans around either (as most are still sleeping the night before off), so you would probably have a better chance to get something signed or even converse with the band members this way.

A hotel experience can give a fan a chance to actually talk for a time with the person they wanted to meet. Yet, there is a lot of risk and possible disappointment involved in trying to meet the band this way. The expos at least offer a better chance to at least get an autograph, with the only downside being a lack of time to really talk to the guests normally. Either way, here are some pointers for the expos:

DON'T expect that just because a person is going to be at a convention he or she will automatically be doing an autograph-session. Check with the convention organizers first, especially if there is no mention of an autograph-session in their advertising. It is possible that the guest will not be able to stay long enough to sign for everyone and would rather not do it at all than disappoint some fans.

Some guest at conventions have been known to charge for autographs as well. Sometimes for charity and sometimes for themselves. So keep that in mind.

If a signing does occur, DO find out when the signing will take place. It is also a good idea to find out where to stand in line for the signing. And keep an eye out! You never know when a line you've been standing in for an hour will suddenly be the WRONG one. ("Oh, you want the line for the autograph-signing, that's it over there. See the 300 people there? This is the line for the bathroom.")

The best place in line for a signing is actually not in front or in back, but somewhere in the middle. Being last always gives you the chance that the guest will have to quit before getting to everyone, while the first so-many are rushed through quickly in order to try to get to as many fans as possible. After a while, however, the line gets into a grove and the guest get a better chance to talk to the fans while autographing stuff.

If the guest does have to leave before you got stuff signed, DON'T take it out on the convention people. It's probably not their fault. Sometimes schedules have to be changed at the last minute to accommodate a plane flight for the guest or other things that can't be helped.

And as a common courtesy to other fans, keep these two things in mind while waiting in line for autographs (it's off topic, but worth mentioning):

DON'T hold spots in the line for your twenty friends and their brothers. Most fans won't care if you're holding a spot for your good buddy who went to get a drink, but anything more than that you're likely to get some dirty looks and possibly be asked to leave by the convention organizers.

DO get your stuff signed and move on. If you want to ask a quick question or the guest asks you something, that's not a problem. Telling your life story to the guest is, however. Keep it short and sweet and let the 500 people behind you get a chance to obtain an autograph as well.

Now, beyond actually meeting up with someone, there are a few other tips to keep in mind:

DON'T bring everything you own for autographs. Most expos state clearly that at most two items can be signed and there's a reason for this -- it cuts down on the writer's cramp for the guest and it makes it more likely that everyone there will get at least one thing signed before the guest has to leave.

Also, while a couple of the band members will sign everything you have, they are well-known for sloppy autographs after doing a few in a row and won't take much care as to where they sign on an item. So leave your 50 albums at home and just bring two or three items.

DO try to have something interesting for the guest to sign. This is actually for YOUR benefit, as you have a greater chance of getting the band member talking to you if you have an item that is unique.

As an example, back in 1986 I managed to get backstage at an ASYLUM show and had the LYN CHRISTOPHER album with me. When Paul saw the album in my hand, he just went nuts. He hadn't seen (at that point) the album in years and talked for several minutes to me and a couple of other fans about recording the two tracks on the album. He also talked a bit about THE ELDER (which someone else had with them) and posed with his hand next to the hand on the cover to prove it was his own.

Thus, something unique had opened up a whole conversation with Paul that may not have happened if it was just a copy of ASYLUM in my hands. Keep that in mind when you're searching for an item to get signed.

If you do meet up with someone and have a chance to say something, DO SAY SOMETHING! Even a "Great show tonight!" or "Thanks for coming to the Expo." is much better than "Hey, you! Sign this!"

If you think you may actually have a chance to ask some questions or just have a conversation with a person, think ahead and come up with something to talk about.

Back in 1984, Peter Criss sat down next to me at a table with a few friends in a bar. Not knowing what to say, I asked Peter the first question that popped into my head, "So, Peter, what is it like to have a beard?" Man, I wanted to die. He took it in good fun, but it was embarrassing just the same.

If you think of something ahead of time, go ahead and write it down if you want. Even odds are that you'll probably forget your comment the second you get an opportunity to meet a person. Writing down questions is also good if a Q&A with a guest will occur at a convention.

Finally, and most importantly, is this tip:

DO be considerate. Think about what you're going to say or ask of the person you're meeting. Don't ask them to come to your birthday party or do a bunch of special things for you. Asking questions is certainly okay, but try to think how the person will react before you ask something. Asking questions like "How much money did you get when you left the band?" or "Your album really sucked, what happened?" is NOT going to go over very well with a person.

Also, there are bound to be times when a person you wanted to meet will not live up to your expectations. Perhaps a bad night for them, or a bad show, or something going on in their personal lives are keeping them from really wanting to stop and talk. That happens. Nothing you can do about that. If you get a chance, try to get a glimpse at the person's body-language before you approach them. If they are stomping around in anger, it's probably not a good time to meet them. And remember, it's better to not be remembered at all than to be remembered as a person with whom they had a bad experience with.

Mainly, just remember that these people are just that -- people. If you keep that in mind above anything else, you'll do just fine when you meet them in the flesh.

Good luck!

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