Welcome To The KISS Toy Store - Can I Take Your Order?
By: Anita Christian

I don't usually take much notice of things like this as I have better things to do with my time and, after all, KISS is just a rock band. But I started reading some of these stories and they're very good, quite funny, and I felt compelled to write something myself and jump on the bandwagon.

I too, have got a little bit caught up in the whole KISS phenomenon since 1997. I was never really much into KISS before that. I can remember when I was nine years old and sitting on the sofa in the lounge watching a group called KISS on the TV play a song called "I Was Made For Lovin' You", and I knew they were big. But that's all. However, when I heard they were coming to New Zealand in 1997 - I had to go and see them, purely because - this is KISS. They're like legends, like the Rolling Stones. I saw the Auckland concert and it really blew me away. From that moment I thought "I have to know more about this band". After that show I went out and bought every KISS video I could find, I would pounce on every magazine that featured the smallest article on them, and I even bought some of their 70's albums. I really did like them. However, since the whole Psycho Circus charade, I too have slowly grown very tired of this thing called KISS. Rock band? No, no, no. Gene's mobile merchandising market. So, within this brief story I would like to point out three things that bug me.

MERCHANDISING - Yawn, yawn, yawn some more. If KISS didn't quite turn into a toy store catalogue in the 70's, they have now. Well, Gene, you ain't havin' any more of my money. I couldn't give a toss about the fluffy slippers, shoelaces, pen holders, broom handles, et al. Gene has single-handedly turned KISS into a real freak show now. To me, KISS are about the MUSIC. I thought that's why they became a band - except in Gene's case where he just wanted the women and the money. I liked them so much after the Auckland concert. Great music. But how can I listen to the band if they don't have any CD's because Gene has his head around making KISS teddy bears. I can't hear KISS if all I've got is a signed, limited edition, collector's item of a rubbish sack tie pinned to my wall.

ACE FREHLEY - Okay, so Ace has had his problems in the past, but in my own personal opinion, he really stands apart from KISS. As I said before, I was at the Auckland concert and the Halloween Dodger Stadium show, and both times my eyes were fixed firmly on Ace and his guitar. He may not be the most technical guitar player in the world, and at times he may seem sloppy, but he knows how to bring that guitar to life. He's got more chops than what Gene or Paul give him credit for and he knows how to play rock music. I can understand if he wants to leave the band and have another shot at solo success.

PSYCHO CIRCUS - I was in America when this CD was released and upon first hearing it I thought - to sum it up - it sucked. I listened to it again and again and again and it grew on me. When, however, I found out that not every member played on it and other musicians were brought in to the studio - I felt cheated. This isn't a KISS album - it's a "various artists" soundtrack. It's like Gene saying "Oh, we're going to do this mammoth tour and shove it in the faces of every other band - but we're not going to get up and physically play. We'll just hire session musos to do that and take all your money!" If this is the case of Psycho Circus not being Ace, Gene, Peter and Paul, I want my $20.00 back I paid for it. It's almost like President Clinton: "Did you play on that album?" "No, I did not have musical relations with this record."

However, at the end of the day, KISS is just a rock band. People move on and changes occur, but I do feel it is sad they have moved away from the music as they were once so good. What they choose to do is, I suppose, up to them. But, guys - I think the time has come to lay KISS as a group to rest. I will always like the music and when, or if, you decide to bring out a REAL KISS album, I may just perk up my ears again. But until then, no, you may not take my order.

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