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Ego, Guitars, and Drums From: TVSquad.com In case you don't know the premise for VH1's Rock School, it's all about one arrogant rock star and a traditional boarding school. KISS' GENE SIMMONS takes on the British boarding school, Christ's Hospital, to teach the kids there a little more about rock. He plans to create a rock band out of these shy, classical music-loving kids. The final exam will be opening for the band Motorhead. After only one episode, they've managed to get a lead singer from the selection of ten or so kids. The singer will be the off-key, off-beat, off-center, but thoroughly adorable and confident Josh aka The Emperor (each kid made up their own "rock" name). He's totally obsessed with rock now, wandering alone with his headphones on and singing "Bohemian Rhapsody" (complete with falsettos). He's already a bit of a loner but he's happy to be on his way to becoming a rock god. GENE SIMMONS isn't only teaching the kids how to master their rock instruments, but he also teaches them rock history. The kids study a bit about Rolling Stone's frontman Mick Jagger as Josh/The Emperor wanders around for a bit. He seems to have already begun his transformation into rock god, talking about himself in the past tense. He says the old Josh was timid and spoke Elvish... the new Josh, the Emperor, is cool. Is this confidence bordering on arrogance? His already annoyed classmates think so. In class, Simmons leads the children to practice primal screaming. Some kids get really into it (of course Josh does) but some are a bit more reserved about it. Steppenwolf's "Born to be Wild" plays in the background as the kids also practice their air guitars. Hell, I would love to have a class period for air guitar practice. Some like Dudley aka Dudders get really into the whole performance whereas some others like Camilla don't see the point so they don't really try. The school's debate society doesn't think this sort of teaching should be allowed at their institution. Rock has no place here, they say. Simmons argues to a room full of children that rock is the modern folk music and thrives on new people. Plus, you'd make loads of money. Kids argue back that money isn't everything at that the mix of rock and sex is also inappropriate, pointing out that Simmons claimed to have slept with 4, 600 women. He is outraged (and rightly so!), crying out, "My character has been attacked and I resent the fact that I claim I slept with 4, 600 -- I object that!" A lot of the kids cheer happily. So when the vote comes around on whether or not this learning should continue, those opposing the rule won the majority. The motion was defeated. Hurrah! Long live rock. Next is choir practice at the chapel (which is beautiful, by the way). Deputy Head Mary Ireland feels a bit uncomfortable because she didn't want to make the act of worship any less serious by letting GENE SIMMONS lead it. He sings KISS' "God gave Rock and Roll to You" and the kids eventually join in. It's actually really cool having a chapel full of kids singing along to him. The Deputy Head admits that it was a great experience for the kids to have them all sing together like that. Some may be enjoying it, but others like Camilla are questioning this entire thing. She doesn't even like rock music! She likes full music like classical and feels as though rock is just pointless noise. Simmons will need to do some work to try and convince her. In the meantime, he needs a guitarist and drummer to go with his lead singer. He starts off with drums and has each kid try out some snare and kick beats. Richard aka Mr. White is a trained percussionist and does fairly well. Dudley aka Dudders does even better though. He's also a brilliant guitarist. Jesse, one of the girls of the group, also plays guitar well and has her long hair to mysterisously cover her face as she strums those chords. She and Dudders are good friends and both worry that if either one of them get the part of guitarist, they'll lose that friendship. Fortunately, Dudders gets the role of drummer and is extremely happy with it. Jesse gets the role of guitarist and is extremely pleased as well. Hurrah for a female guitarist! Unfortunately, Mr. White is feeling a little left out. The episode ends with Simmons being kind of smarmy and saying what a wonderful teacher he is. Ahh... rock stars. Next week: they desperately need a bassist but no one's good at it; romance buds; and the final line-up is revealed. |
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