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GENE SIMMONS Happy To KISS And Tell For Reality TVFrom: Herald Sun Posted: GENE SIMMONS, KISS's infamous frontman, is dishes the dirt on facelifts, how downloading music is ruining the industry, negotiating with kids and ladies of the night. MOST celebrities who have facelifts keep them private. But GENE SIMMONS isn't like most celebrities. The KISS singer filmed he and partner Shannon Tweed's his 'n' her facelifts for their reality series Family Jewels. It was graphic viewing that made headlines. Simmons was thrilled. "If you want to see me wiping my ass on camera I will,'' Simmons says. "I'll take a s--- on air, I don't care.'' On a CNN plastic-surgery special last year, people were shown photos of Simmons before and after the cosmetic surgery -- most got the pictures the wrong way around. "I'm delusional,'' Simmons, 58, says. "I thought I was beautiful before and I'm even more stunning now. The male of the species doesn't have to worry about those things, we just have to have a good job, then we'll attract the female. "The female of the species is unfortunately stuck in that biological thing of stimulating the male of the species. Which is why the beauty industry is so powerful -- women.'' Simmons is one of the most famous wedding-dodgers alive. He's been "happily unmarried'' to Tweed -- an actor and former Playboy playmate -- since 1985. "Women reluctantly point to our family and say it works,'' Simmons says. "But they don't like the non-married part because no social security is involved: a financial obligation if you will. I refuse to have a financial obligation to anyone other than the mother who gave me life. "Women's biology means they make one or two eggs a month and by their middle years stop being able to procreate entirely, so their biological urge is to corner a man so when they can't reproduce they have a man. "The phrase is 'I'm going to get my claws in him' or 'he's a good catch' -- because he's trying to run away. Man's tendency is not to stick around. Which is unfortunate when you look at all the fathers and husbands who've walked out. Women are never surprised when that happens, they're just surprised it's happened to them. "The reason I'm crazy about Shannon is she's a modern, 21st-century woman and she should be teaching all other women to get a life, get a hobby. Stop torturing the men.'' Simmons has made no secret of his arrangement with Tweed and continues to be one of the world's most notorious ladies' men. "I just don't care,'' Simmons says. "That's why you never read about me in those trash mags women are addicted to. If I go to a strip club, and when I'm in Australia I intend to, I'll stand in front of the club and pose with the strippers all you like. You can take my photo and put them in your magazines because I'll be smiling.'' Simmons is writing a book called Ladies of the Night -- "a personal and historical perspective of the oldest profession in the world''. He's in the process of interviewing "high-end ladies'' for the tome, due out this year. "They make a very good living doing what biology dictates, which is they charge for their companionship,'' Simmons says. "What's the difference between that and a 15-year-old kid who eagerly tries to feel up his girlfriend but has to pay for the movie tickets and take her out to dinner? Men will always pay, they have always paid, call it what you will -- whether it's marriage, girlfriend or ladies of the night.'' Simmons will launch the book with a campaign to legalise prostitution. "Anything consenting adults agree to behind closed doors should be their business. Even in the New Testament, God prevents people from killing the prostitute.'' Family Jewels ("You mean GENE SIMMONS' Family Jewels, notice how it sounds better,'' he corrects) highlights his two well-adjusted teenagers Nicholas and Sophie. A proud Simmons reels off their latest school reports: a string of straight As. "They're both extraordinary young people because that's their job,'' Simmons says. "They have no other purpose except to do well in school and be charming. I'll take care of all the rest, I'll risk my life, I'll make all the money. "The idea of negotiating with kids is lunacy. It's pathetic what's happened to the male of the species. The father disciplinarian has all but disappeared in society. I see all these grown men negotiating with kids who've just learnt to wipe their asses. It's f---ing lunacy.'' Kiss remain one of the most profitable acts in music through touring and merchandise, yet haven't released a new album in 10 years. Bandmate PAUL STANLEY realises people coming to KISS shows want hits not new material, but Simmons is more blunt. "There's no new KISS material because there's no record industry,'' Simmons says. "Any band who tries to do new material is trying to climb a slippery mountain. Every day record companies are folding. It'd be nice to have new KISS songs, but what's the business model? Do you just put songs on the internet for free? Then what?'' Simmons was one of the most vocal musicians to call for those caught illegally downloading to be prosecuted. "They're crooks,'' he says. "I would have sued the very first one and the very last one. As soon as you take somebody's property, that's stealing. People say to me 'You're rich, you have enough money'. It's actually not for anyone to decide that. I'll let you know when I'm too rich. The last time I checked, what we do isn't called charity, it's called the music business. "Here we are today with exactly what I said would happen happening. The very same people that love the music the most have slit its throat and they're surprised it's dying. 'How come my new band can't get a shot?' 'Cos you killed it, bitch. "Every day college kids who probably love music more than anybody are the same people slashing the record industry's throat by file sharing and downloading. It's the saddest thing for new bands. Doesn't affect me or KISS. We can continue to play stadiums and do very well, and we release DVDs. "But there isn't a chance for a new band to become the next Beatles or KISS because there isn't the infrastructure to do it.'' There may be no new KISS material, but that's not to say there's nothing for fans to spend their money on. Stanley released a solo album last year, and embarked on a world tour. Simmons saw a handful of shows -- "it reminded me why I'm in a band with him, he's the best frontman in the business with the best voice in rock 'n' roll, period''. Simmons is threatening a box set of 250 solo songs that have never been released, as well as a KISS box set of "hundreds'' of rarities. Their Kissology DVD series has sold healthily in the US, with Simmons promising more instalments because, unlike most bands, KISS have "filmed ourselves from the beginning -- we still have vaults full of unheard and unseen stuff''. He has a third series of Family Jewels about to air in the US and makes an appearance in the new series of Ugly Betty. Stanley says he'd rather "take a bullet'' than be filmed for reality TV, but Simmons can't get enough of the genre. As well as Family Jewels, he put together a teenage band for British show Rock School and just appeared in a celebrity version of Donald Trump's series The Apprentice, which raised money for charity. Not that that was Simmons' motivation for appearing alongside Stephen Baldwin and Omarosa. "Anybody who tells you they're doing a television show to raise money for charity is lying,'' Simmons says. "They do a television show to be on television and to position themselves in the marketplace in a certain way. Yes, I gave the money to charity, but the reason for being on TV is you think it's a cool thing to do.'' Simmons' extracurricular work includes a comic-publishing company and overseeing the endless KISS merchandise, which runs from coffee houses to condoms to coffins. He does it, he says, because he can. "See, the biggest stars in the world today are rap stars because they're much more interesting than today's rock stars, who mostly look like garbage collectors. "KISS carries on the grand tradition that the stage is a holy place and the fans are our bosses. We owe you something. This is a privilege and an honour. "It'd be cheaper to just plug in some small amps and play songs. It costs a fortune to bring KISS shows around the world. But we consider that our mission.'' It's that mission that brings the band back to Australia, one of their most loyal markets. "We love the Australian fans,'' Simmons says. "And I probably have a few kids down there I should say hello to.'' GENE SIMMONS' Family Jewels, Biography Channel, Wednesdays, 9.30pm. KISS, Australian Grand Prix, March 16. $149, Ticketek. |
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